Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
