so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I licked your asshole in confidence.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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