Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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