Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
