glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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