I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize