it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Come share oat with me in your robe
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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