Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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