didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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