I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
