spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
