Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
