They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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