I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
