I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
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