dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i just google imaged poop.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
How's work?
Spinning.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
