Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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