just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize