too bad you live with your parents still
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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