Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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