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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (940): View more from Texas

  Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago

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• (850): View more from Florida

  For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.

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• (805): View more from California

  I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.

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