Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Where were you when I was single???

  (1-617): View more from Massachusetts

  Still in diapers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Where were you when I was single??? (1-617): Still in diapers. http://tfl.nu/ngk8
  Replies (15) Good night (1543) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen http://tfl.nu/zk0c
  Replies (55) Good night (1106) Bad night (4272)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend. http://tfl.nu/zfxw
  Replies (10) Good night (3506) Bad night (661)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams. http://tfl.nu/ox7r
  Replies (47) Good night (10743) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here? http://tfl.nu/0w0h
  Replies (23) Good night (5140) Bad night (2236)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  where are you?

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Hypothermia

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): where are you? (240): Hypothermia http://tfl.nu/1rtk
  Replies (20) Good night (2294) Bad night (4036)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you http://tfl.nu/lizp
  Replies (7) Good night (2726) Bad night (783)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related. http://tfl.nu/0zhl
  Replies (12) Good night (2530) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops http://tfl.nu/nsjn
  Replies (5) Good night (706) Bad night (1184)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today. (773): I'm not sure which feat is more impressive... http://tfl.nu/ga4t
  Replies (2) Good night (1492) Bad night (506)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand. http://tfl.nu/mrxq
  Replies (5) Good night (430) Bad night (848)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.

  (650): View more from California

  And so far nothing been broken!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum. (650): And so far nothing been broken! http://tfl.nu/0yij
  Replies (4) Good night (2387) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned. http://tfl.nu/z20l
  Replies (20) Good night (700) Bad night (2294)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  You are a god.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning. (1-803): You are a god. http://tfl.nu/xtrk
  Replies (2) Good night (692) Bad night (265)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly. http://tfl.nu/ykqa
  Replies (0) Good night (451) Bad night (226)

Randomize