He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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