obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
The best revenge is premature balding
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
It's never too late to be topless.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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