It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Randomize
