I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
