things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
