If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
