just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
