just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
