Texts From Last Night

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  (478): View more from Georgia

  So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking

  (404): View more from Georgia

  how did that work out?

  (478): View more from Georgia

  Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...

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  (478): So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking (404): how did that work out? (478): Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder... http://tfl.nu/o1yp
  Replies (15) Good night (5308) Bad night (1627)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.

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  (412): Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody. http://tfl.nu/qy8l
  Replies (7) Good night (967) Bad night (4929)
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  (587): View more from Alberta

  Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea

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  (587): Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea http://tfl.nu/gdya
  Replies (5) Good night (2753) Bad night (1482)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.

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  (604): Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza. http://tfl.nu/qm6i
  Replies (4) Good night (2223) Bad night (1251)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?

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  (817): did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER? http://tfl.nu/7lnp
  Replies (10) Good night (2046) Bad night (1297)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.

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  (937): Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like. http://tfl.nu/1ho6
  Replies (14) Good night (1264) Bad night (3376)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.

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  (610): It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes. http://tfl.nu/cpyt
  Replies (8) Good night (2282) Bad night (661)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"

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  (480): Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good" http://tfl.nu/cw6w
  Replies (6) Good night (1274) Bad night (831)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.

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  (517): winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito. http://tfl.nu/1g88
  Replies (15) Good night (1934) Bad night (528)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  All you need to know is that isn't jizz

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  (206): All you need to know is that isn't jizz http://tfl.nu/nxjk
  Replies (3) Good night (479) Bad night (785)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.

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  (203): I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed. http://tfl.nu/lxpv
  Replies (10) Good night (794) Bad night (447)
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  (721): View more from

  I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix

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  (721): I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix http://tfl.nu/vrhy
  Replies (5) Good night (640) Bad night (302)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?

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  (813): Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating? http://tfl.nu/e7er
  Replies (2) Good night (501) Bad night (269)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...

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  (717): You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat... http://tfl.nu/k4we
  Replies (1) Good night (419) Bad night (333)
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  (619): View more from California

  I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.

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  (619): I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to. http://tfl.nu/633r
  Replies (1) Good night (642) Bad night (317)

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