DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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