I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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