You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
