well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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