I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
