Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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