Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
