How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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