I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
