Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
it's great music for shaving your balls
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.