i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize