Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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