Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
