i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
