Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
