I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
