Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
