I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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