Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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