i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
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His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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